Category: lost

7.9.23: Golden darkness

Ruth Kirk
ivoxis: Pixabay.

Yesterday morning, as I greeted my icons one by one, the first words of this prayer came directly into my mind. These verses attempt to describe experiencing the presence of Christ during wordless prayer: in life, whilst dying, and in paradise. We can dip in and out of this experience until we die, but after death it will be all we know, and all we want to know.

Be silent before the LORD, all humanity.
(Zechariah 2:13; NLT). 

Moses approached the thick darkness where God was.
(Exodus 20:21; NLT).

1. Golden darkness deep within,
Far from stress, and shame and sin:
Lost in worship, bliss and peace
We rest, in life, with Christ, our Priest.

2. Golden splendour all about,
Letting go of dread and doubt:
Lost in rapture, joy and love
We walk, with Christ, to heaven above.

3. Golden glory all around,
Free from pain, with mercy crowned:
Lost in ecstasy, we soar
To join with Christ, for evermore.

Then, together with them, we who are still alive and remain on the earth will be caught up in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. Then we will be with the Lord forever (1 Thessalonians 4:17; NLT).

References

1: Life

I will give you the treasures of darkness and riches from secret places so that you may know that I am the Lord (Isaiah 45:3; CSB).

We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves (2 Corinthians 4:7; NLT). 

Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls (Matthew 11:28-9; NLT).

We have a great High Priest who has entered heaven, Jesus the Son of God (Hebrews 4:14; NLT). 

2: Dying

Suddenly, an angel of the Lord appeared among them, and the radiance of the Lord’s glory surrounded them (Luke 2:9; NLT). 

Worship the LORD in all his holy splendor (1 Chronicles 16:29; NLT). 

Let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings (Hebrews 10:22; NIV). 

Jesus’ appearance was transformed, and his clothes became dazzling white, far whiter than any earthly bleach could ever make them (Mark 9:2-3; NLT).

Jesus said to his disciples: “Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God still, and trust in me. There are many rooms in my Father’s house; if there were not, I should have told you. I am going now to prepare a place for you, and after I have gone and prepared you a place, I shall return to take you with me; so that where I am you may be too” (John 14:1-3; JB).

Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me (Psalm 23:4; KJV).

The dust returns to the ground it came from, and the spirit returns to God who gave it (Ecclesiastes 12:7; NIV). 

3: Beyond death

The Son radiates God’s own glory and expresses the very character of God (Hebrews 1:3; NLT). 

He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies (Psalm 103:4; NLT).

Those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint (Isaiah 40:31; NLT).

Everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ and become one with him (Philippians 3:8-9; NLT). 

21.2.23: A direct connection

Ruth Kirk

There is a God in heaven who reveals secrets (Daniel 2:28; NLT). 

A dream

A few days ago, I dreamed I was lost in a city I had never visited before, and where I knew no-one at all. It was dark, and after trying, unsuccessfully, to use a river as an escape route I was wet and cold. I was also afraid, overwhelmed, alone and desperate, very close to panicking.

Revelation

Despite my waking sense of calm acceptance, this dream revealed the emotions present in my unconscious mind after receiving a new diagnosis of Autonomic Dysfunction, accompanied by a very slow heart rate. I was given this diagnosis last Tuesday, and the dream came during the following night.

As soon as I began to pray next morning, I saw that although the overt scenario of my dream bore no resemblance to what is currently happening in my life, the emotions it generated were highly relevant. When awake, I wasn’t feeling these emotions at all. However, during my dream, I experienced them to the full. After jotting them down during the night, and reading them next morning, I could see how closely they related to current events in my life.

Dreams: symbols of past and present realities

Then I saw and understood more generally how the events in my dreams symbolise, reflect and explore what is happening in my life. Until having the dream described above, I had always thought that my dreams revealed buried emotions belonging to past events and traumas, and of course this may still be the case with some dreams. However, last Wednesday God showed me that my dreams also reveal current hidden or suppressed emotions – emotions I don’t experience when awake.

A direct connection to the unconscious mind

This came as a complete surprise. I now see that my dreams offer a much more direct connection to my unconscious mind than I had previously realised. This link is a pearl beyond price to me, so  I’ll be reflecting on it in the days to come, and looking forward to learning more.

God speaks again and again, though people do not recognise it. He speaks in dreams, in visions of the night, when deep sleep falls on people as they lie in their beds (Job 33:14-15; NLT).

Reference

I will give you treasures hidden in the darkness – secret riches. I will do this so you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, the one who calls you by name (Isaiah 45:3; NLT).

16.2.23: In life

Ruth Kirk

The blog I began writing yesterday needs a few more days of work to get it ready for posting, so today I’ve chosen this poem, written a while ago. With several demanding medical issues going on at present, it’s a pleasure to dip into my store of pieces prepared earlier. I always knew they had a purpose, and now I’m discovering what it is!

Love the stranger (Deuteronomy 10:19; NKJV).

In life,
Are you a friend to strangers –
Everyone whose path
You cross?

In life,
Are you a friend to strangers –
Those in trouble,
Hurt, or lost?

In life,
Are you a friend to strangers?
Loving is
Your sacred task.

“In life,
Were you a friend to strangers?” 
This is what the Lord
Will ask.

In due season God will judge everyone, both good and bad, for all their deeds (Ecclesiastes 3:17; NLT).

Whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me (Matthew 25:40; NIV).

The Rosary Hospital 

To my great pleasure, I took an order for a fiat rosary yesterday, and very much enjoyed making it today. It just needs the finishing touches tomorrow with my new super-sharp trimming shears, a very thoughtful present from my husband.

6.10.22: God’s light

Ruth Kirk

Context: I woke after a long, vivid dream about being on a bike-ride, and getting completely lost in the dark. As I surfaced, I began to say the Lord’s Prayer, but didn’t get very far…

You, Lord, are my lamp; the Lord turns my darkness into light (2 Samuel 22:29; NLT).

Suddenly, for the first time ever, I was looking directly into my soul. It was softly illuminated by God’s light, just as an oil lamp creates a pool of light in darkness. Previously, I’ve only seen my soul’s dark surface from the outside.

My soul seemed completely empty, but I couldn’t be sure of this because of the darkness beyond the pool of light. If it had any boundaries, they too were lost in the deep, surrounding shadows. This sight lasted no more than a few seconds, then it was over.

Afterwards, I wondered if this experience had really happened, or if I had imagined it. However, when I was saying grace before breakfast, I saw that not only is God light, but that all light is the light of God.

The city has no need of sun or moon, for the glory of God illuminates the city, and the Lamb is its light (Revelation 21:23; NLT). 

References

Clouds and thick darkness surround him (Psalm 97:2; NIV).

Moses approached the thick darkness where God was (Exodus 20:21; NLT).

Though I sit in darkness, the Lord will be my light (Micah 7:8; NLT).

This, then, is the message we heard from Jesus and declare to you: God is light, and in God there is no darkness at all (1 John 1:5; TIB).

I will give you the treasures of darkness and riches from secret places so that you may know that I am the Lord (Isaiah 45:3; CSB).

Jesus spoke to the people once more and said, “I am the light of the world. If you follow me, you won’t have to walk in darkness, because you will have the light that leads to life” (John 8:12; NLT). 

Lost in darkness

Ruth Kirk


Jesus spoke to the people once more and said, “I am the light of the world. If you follow me, you won’t have to walk in darkness, because you will have the light that leads to life” (John 8:12; NLT).

Though my prayers
Are lost in darkness,
You are there to light the way.

Though my thanks
Are said in darkness,
You, Lord, listen every day.

Though my joy
Is locked in darkness,
You will come to set me free.

Though my life
Is spent in darkness,
You will not abandon me.


God has said, “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you”
(Hebrews 13:5; NLT).

_________________________________

Come back soon

Ruth Kirk


O Lord, come back to us!
(Psalm 90:13; NLT).

Lord,
Come back soon
To make us whole,
For we are lost in pain.
Our lives are ruled
By suffering;
We long for health, in vain.

Lord,
Come back soon
To change our minds,
For we are lost in sin.
Our lives are ruled
By selfishness,
Forgetting you, our King.

Lord,
Come back soon
To heal our hearts,
For we are lost in hate.
Our lives are ruled
By prejudice;
We spurn your narrow gate.

Lord,
Come back soon
To save our souls,
For we must all repent;
Then trust in you,
Transform our lives,
And love the One you sent.

God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him (John 3:17; NLT).

In darkness

Ruth Kirk

If you are walking in darkness, without a ray of light, trust in the Lord, and rely on your God (Isaiah 50:10; NLT). 

I grope towards you, Lord,
In darkness,

Blunder,
On your narrow way;

Burdened
By my trials and sorrows,

Trusting you, Lord,
Every day.

I grope towards you, Lord,
In silence;

Lost in stillness;
All alone;

Yearning, Lord,
To see your face,

When you draw near
To take me home.

They shall see his face
(Revelation 22:4; KJV). 

Lost in stillness (#2 of 2 linked poems)

Ruth Kirk

Be still and know that I am God.
(Psalm 46:10; NIV)



Lost in stillness;
Lost in prayer.
Lost in silence,
Joy, and light.

Lost in beauty;
Lost in love.
Lost in darkness:
Lost in God.

One in stillness;
One in prayer.
One in silence,
Joy, and light.

One in beauty;
One in love.
One in darkness:
One in God.

He has made known to us in all wisdom and insight the mystery of his will, according to his purpose which he set forth in Christ as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth.
(Ephesians 1:9-10; RSV)

☦️

Come to me

Ruth Kirk

Image: jianke 1964, Pixabay

🤎

When will you come to me? (Psalm 101:2; NIV).

1. Come to me
In fear and pain,
When all my hopes, Lord God,
Seem vain.

2. Come when all is dark
And still,
To help me face
Your perfect will.

3. Come:
Death is already here;
My final breath
Is drawing near.

4. Come, for I am lost,
Alone:
Please come, at last,
To take me home.

🤎

References

1. My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? (Psalm 22:1; NIV).

We have become old, dry bones – all hope is gone (Ezekiel 37:11; NLT).

2. You have taken away my companions and my loved ones. Darkness is my closest friend (Psalm 88:18; NLT).

You will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect (Romans 12:2; NLT).

If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine (Matthew 26:39; NLT).

3. My spirit is crushed, and my life is nearly snuffed out. The grave is ready to receive me (Job 17:1; NLT).

The time of my death is near (2 Timothy 4:6; NLT).

4. My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, so far from my cries of anguish? (Psalm 22:1; NIV).

You will not leave my soul among the dead or allow your holy one to rot in the grave (Psalm 16:10; NLT).

You come to me

Ruth Kirk

Image: John Greece, Pixabay

✝️

1. You come to me
In fear and pain,
When every hope, Lord God,
Seems vain.

2. You come when life is dark
And chill,
To help me face
Your perfect will.

3. You come, Lord,
When my race is run,
And all my days on earth
Are done.

4. You come when I am lost,
Alone –
You come, at last,
To take me home.

✝️

References

1. Be strong, and do not fear, for your God is coming to destroy your enemies. He is coming to save you (Isaiah 35:4; NLT).  

We have become old, dry bones – all hope is gone (Ezekiel 37:11; NLT).

2. My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine (Matthew 26:39; NLT).

You will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect (Romans 12:2; NLT).

3. My spirit is crushed, and my life is nearly snuffed out. The grave is ready to receive me (Job 17:1; NLT). 

4. You have taken away my companions and my loved ones. Darkness is my closest friend (Psalm 88:18; NLT).

Jesus, knowing that all was now finished, said (to fulfil the scripture),“I thirst” (John 19:28; RSV).

You will not leave my soul among the dead or allow your holy one to rot in the grave (Psalm 16:10; NLT).

He restores my soul (Psalm 23:3; NKJV).