Breast cancer, mastectomy,, Prayer, spiritual development, personal growth, faith, exploration, wholeness,

In myself, I’m nothing


Hello everyone, just a quick update: I’m slowly recovering from my surgery at home, and have started to write again. This prayer is fresh from yesterday morning, with further work to complete it today XXXXX


In myself, I’m nothing, Lord,
For I am but a dream;

Yet I can love you, Father God, 
The One who rules supreme. 

In myself, I’m nothing, Lord, 
For I am less than dust;

Yet I can honour Mary, Lord,
Who gave you all her trust. 

In myself, I’m nothing, Lord,
And few will mourn my loss;

Yet I can serve your only Son,  
Who died upon the cross.

In myself, I’m nothing, Lord,
For I am very weak;

Yet I can host your Spirit, Lord, 
For blessed are the meek. 



I am nothing but dust and ashes (Genesis 18:27; NIV).

You sweep people away like dreams that disappear (Psalm 90:5; NLT).

You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind (Luke 10:27; NLT).

You, O Lord, are supreme over all the earth (Psalm 83:18; NLT). 

The virgin will conceive a child! She will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel, which means ‘God is with us’ (Matthew 1:23; NLT).

He took notice of his lowly servant girl, and from now on all generations will call me blessed (Luke 1:48; NLT).

Mary responded, “I am the Lord’s servant. May everything you have said about me come true” (Luke 1:38; NLT). 

He considered me trustworthy and appointed me to serve him (1 Timothy 1:12; NLT).

God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16; NLT).

He humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on a cross (Philippians 2:8; NLT). 

He knows how weak we are (Psalm 103:14; NLT).

You have received the Holy Spirit, and he lives within you (1 John 2:27; NLT).

Blessed are the meek (Matthew 5:5; NIV).

Breast cancer, mastectomy,, Personal growth, faith, prayer, contemplation, love, oneness,, sin

The shedding of blood


Hello to all readers. I thought you might be interested in some catch-up news, as quite a lot has been happening recently. Yesterday I made my first confession, and today was received into the Catholic Church, making my first Holy Communion.

After a recent diagnosis of breast-cancer, I’ll be having a mastectomy tomorrow. I hope to publish my blog as usual, but if I’m not well enough, there could be a gap.

Much love to you all, and thank you so much for your encouragement, praise and messages, all of which mean a lot to me.

With all best wishes from Ruth XXXXXXX


Without the shedding of blood, there is no forgiveness (Hebrews 9:22; NLT).


Long, long ago,
Before you paid our price, 
We drained the blood 
Of perfect lambs,
In holy sacrifice.

Then you were sent 
To save us from God’s wrath.
What did we do? 
We flogged you, Lord,
And hung you on the cross.

We nailed you there,
And slowly drained your blood.
Yet as you died 
You bore our sins, 
And saved us with your love.



I have paid the price to set you free (Isaiah 44:22; NLT).

You must sacrifice a one-year-old male lamb with no defects (Leviticus 23:12; NLT).

God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16; NLT).

He ordered Jesus flogged with a lead-tipped whip (Mark 15:15; NLT).

“He himself bore our sins” in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness (1 Peter 2:24; NIV).

Since we have been made right in God’s sight by the blood of Christ, he will certainly save us from God’s condemnation (Romans 5:9; NLT).

We know what real love is because Jesus gave up his life for us (1 John 3:16; NLT).

Prayer, suffering, life, courage, help, bear, illness, mental, physical,

What is this cross?


Then [Jesus] said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me” (Luke 9:23; NLT).


What is this cross
Of which you speak, Lord Jesus?

What is this burden
I must bear through life?

It’s everything you suffer 
For my sake, child;

It’s every kind of sickness, grief,
And strife.

What makes this cross
So critical, Lord Jesus?

What makes this burden count
Right up to death?

It’s facing all your suffering
With faith, child,

Whilst showing love to all
Till your last breath.



Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows (John 16:33; NLT).

I was given a thorn in my flesh […] Three times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:7-9; NLT).

In everything we do, we show that we are true ministers of God. We patiently endure troubles and hardships and calamities of every kind (2 Corinthians 6:4; NLT).

Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them (Romans 12.9; NLT).

You have heard the law that say, ‘Love your neighbour’ and hate your enemy. But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! (Matthew 5:43-4; NLT).

Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34; NIV).

Prayer, suffering, life, courage, help, bear, illness, mental, physical,

We cannot share your light



We cannot share your light
Without your darkness.

We cannot share your peace
Without your pain. 

We cannot share your hope 
Without your sorrow.

We cannot share your way
Without your shame. 

We cannot share your truth 
Without your weeping.

We cannot share your faith
Without your loss. 

We cannot share your joy 
Without your anguish.

We cannot share your love 
Without your cross.



I am the light of the world (John 8:12; NLT).

At noon, darkness fell across the whole land until three o’clock (Matthew 27:45; NLT).

Peace I leave you; my peace I give you (John 14:27; NIV).

Then the soldiers nailed him to the cross (Mark 15:24; NLT).

His name will be the hope of all the world (Matthew 12:21; NLT).

He began to be sorrowful and troubled (Matthew 26:37; NLT).

I am the way, the truth, and the life (John 14:6; NLT).

He endured the cross, disregarding its shame (Hebrews 12:2; NLT).

Then Jesus wept (John 11:35; NLT).

Father, into your hands I commit my spirit (Luke 23:46; NIV).

My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? (Mark 15:34; NLT).

Jesus was filled with the joy of the Holy Spirit (Luke 10:21; NLT).

He was in such agony of spirit that his sweat fell to the ground like great drops of blood (Luke 22:44; NLT).

Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends (John 15:13; NIV).

Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me (Luke 9:23; NIV).

Prayer, suffering, life, courage, help, bear, illness, mental, physical,

When I crave sympathy


When I crave sympathy, 
Forgetting love is key,

You tell me straight
What I must do:

Take up your cross, 
Like me.

When I am selfish,
And my heart is feeling numb, 

 You tell me straight
What I must do:

Now, leave your nets, 
And come.

When I’m ungrateful,
And forget you’ve set me free,

You tell me straight
What I must do:

Leave all, 
And follow me.



Then [Jesus] said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me” (Luke 9:23; NLT).

Jesus called out to them, “Come, follow me, and I will show you how to fish for people!” And they left their nets at once and followed him Mark 1:17-18; NLT).

As Jesus left the town, he saw a tax collector named Levi sitting at his tax collector’s booth. “Follow me and be my disciple,” Jesus said to him (Luke 5:27; NLT).

You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free (John 8:32; NLT).

Personal growth, faith, prayer, contemplation, love, oneness,

Your children


May we, your children,
Shine with radiant light.   

May we, your children,
Praise you day and night.

May we, your children,
Bear our cross each day.

May we, your children,
Tread your narrow way.

May we, your children,
Thank you that we live.

May we, your children,
Work hard to forgive.

May we, your children,
Serve you, Lord, with grace. 

May we, your children,
One day see your face.



The righteous will shine like the sun in their Father’s kingdom (Matthew 13:43; NLT).

She never left the temple but stayed there day and night, worshipping God with fasting and prayer (Luke 2:37; NLT).

Take up your cross and follow me (Matthew 16:24; NLT).

Small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it (Matthew 7:14; NIV).

Give thanks in all circumstances (1 Thessalonians 5:18; NIV).

If you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you (Matthew 6:14; NIV). 

Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace (1 Peter 4:10; NIV).

Now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face (1 Corinthians 13:12; NRSV).

body, mind, heart, soul, realisation, important, prayer, contemplation,

I want to follow you


I want to follow you,

And grow more like you
Every day;

To bear my cross
Along your way,

Until I reach 
My death.

Then I will be
At one with you,

And with 
The holy Trinity,  

One union 
For infinity – 

My final breath.



If you do not carry your own cross and follow me, you cannot be my disciple (Luke 14:27; NLT).

We will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ (Ephesians 4:15; NLT).

The dust returns to the ground it came from, and the spirit returns to God who gave it (Ecclesiastes 12:7; NIV).

Whoever is united with the Lord is one with him in spirit (1 Corinthians 6:17; NIV).