Breast cancer, mastectomy,, Prayer, suffering, life, courage, help, bear, illness, mental, physical,

A Gethsemane experience

 

On the day of my mastectomy, as I waited on a trolley outside the anaesthetic room, I was suddenly overwhelmed by a profound terror of suffering and death, just as Jesus was in the Garden of Gethsemane. I felt completely helpless, despairing and alone, shaking uncontrollably with cold and fear. 

Then my surgeon entered the room in blue scrubs. She must have seen at once how distressed I was, because she came straight over to me, putting her arms around me and bending down to lay her head gently on my chest. She seemed like an angel of comfort and strength. I managed to whisper, through chattering teeth, “I’m so frightened!” She didn’t even speak, just held me as I sobbed helplessly. 

After a time, realising how cold I was, she moved to stand behind me, rubbing my arms to warm me, until I was pushed into an ante-room and quickly, skilfully anaesthetised. 

That evening, after the surgery, I wept again. I felt as if I had experienced something of what Christ suffered in Gethsemane, just as those gazing at a representation of Jesus on the cross occasionally undergo the pain and powerlessness of his crucifixion. 

Next day, however, I realised that rather than we ordinary mortals sometimes sharing what Jesus experienced, it was, in fact, he who fully shared our primeval, human terror in the face of imminent suffering and death.

 Of course, there are major differences between my experience and his. I was facing my profound fear of anaesthesia and surgery solely for my own benefit. Jesus, on the other hand, was facing betrayal, torture and death so our sins could be forgiven. I hope I will never cease to thank him for what he faced and endured for our sake.

 

References

My heart pounds in my chest. The terror of death assaults me. Fear and trembling overwhelm me, and I can’t stop shaking (Psalm 55:4-5; NLT).

They went to the olive grove called Gethsemane, and Jesus said, “Sit here while I go and pray.” He took Peter, James and John with him, and he became deeply troubled and distressed. He told them, “My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.” He went on a little further and fell to the ground. He prayed that, if it were possible, the awful hour awaiting him might pass him by (Mark 14:32-5; NLT).  

Then an angel from heaven appeared and strengthened him. He prayed more fervently, and he was in such agony of spirit that his sweat fell to the ground like great drops of blood (Luke 22:43-4; NLT).

Angels came and took care of Jesus (Matthew 4:11; NLT).

In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace (Ephesians 1:7; NIV).

God proves his love for us in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us (Romans 5:8, NRSV). 

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Prayer, suffering, life, courage, help, bear, illness, mental, physical,

Christ hears

 

Christ hears the prayers 
Of our troubled minds, 
As he pleads in Gethsemane.

Christ hears the prayers 
Of our stricken hearts,
As he hangs on Golgotha’s tree.

Christ hears the prayers 
Of our wretched souls,
As he yearns for death’s release.

Christ hears the prayers 
Of our failing strength,
As he finds, at last, God’s peace.

 

References 

You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind (Luke 10:27; NLT).

He hears us (1 John 5:14; NIV).

They went to the olive grove called Gethsemane, and Jesus said, “Sit here while I go and pray” (Mark 14:32; NLT).

He was in such agony of spirit that his sweat fell to the ground like great drops of blood (Luke 22:44; NLT).

If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me.Yet I want your will to be done, not mine (Matthew 26:39; NLT).

They brought Jesus to a place called Golgotha (which means Place of the Skull) (Mark 15:22; NLT).

Then the soldiers nailed him to the cross (Mark 15:24; NLT).

My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? (Mark 15:34; NLT).

Then Jesus shouted, “Father, I entrust my spirit into your hands!” And with those words he breathed his last (Luke 23:46; NLT).

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prayer, healing, contemplation, oneness, love,, spiritual development, personal growth, faith, exploration, wholeness,

One with you

Lord, we are forever 
One with you.

We come from you; remain in you;
Return to you. 

Your Spirit never leaves us,
Nor forsakes us –

Lord, we are forever
One with you.

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Born from the oblivion 
Of Eden,

And exiled to this world
To seek your way    

Through all the trials and sorrows
Living brings us –

Lord, we are forever
One with you.

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In time, we face 
Gethsemane’s deep anguish,

And walk the lonely shadows   
Of death’s vale,

Till exile ends, 
And we come home to Eden –

Where, Lord, we are forever 
One with you.

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References:

I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb (Jeremiah 1:5; NLT).

Remain in me, and I will remain in you (John 15:4; NLT).

The Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6; NIV).

I will be a sanctuary to you during your time in exile (Ezekiel 11:16; NLT).

Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows (John 16:33; NLT).

Walk in the way of love (Ephesians 5:2; NIV). 

My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death (Matthew 26:38; NLT).

Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me (Psalm 23:4; KJV).

The dust returns to the ground it came from, and the spirit returns to God who gave it (Ecclesiastes 12:7; NIV).

Then we will be with the Lord forever (1 Thessalonians 4:17; NLT).

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Prayer, suffering, life, courage, help, bear, illness, mental, physical,

Gethsemane

Father, if you are willing, please take this cup off suffering away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine (Luke 22:42; NLT).

I trust in God, so why should I be afraid? (Psalm 56:4; NLT).

My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? (Mark 15:34; NLT).

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Father,

In Gethsemane,
Christ begged you

To take away the suffering
He faced.

But you did not,
And he embraced your will.

So, may we face our suffering
With his courage,

Even when we, like him,
Feel you’ve forsaken us.

 

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