Breast cancer, mastectomy,, chronic fatigue, contemplation, depression, mental illness, Prayer, suffering

Contemplation

Father, 
When I come to you in silence 
My body can’t be left outside the door;
So I share my pain and sickness with you,
Then I find they trouble me no more. 

Father,
When I search for you in stillness  
Endless thoughts and fantasies hold sway;
So I share my vague distractions with you, 
Then I find they slowly drift away.

Father, 
When I seek you out in private 
Painful feelings can’t be pushed aside; 
So I share my rage and sorrow with you,
Then I find they quietly subside. 

Father,
When I wait for you in darkness 
Terror sometimes shakes me to the core; 
But I share my fear and anguish with you,
Then I let them go, Lord, and adore. 

 

References

Be silent before the Sovereign Lord (Zephaniah 1:7; NIV).

Be still and know that I am God (Psalm 46:10; NIV). 

When you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father in private (Matthew 6:6; NLT).

Wait for the Lord (Psalm 37:34; NIV).

Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed (Mark 1:35; NIV).

We adore you as the one who is over all things (1 Chronicles 29:11; NLT).

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Your way

When there’s something 
Nagging at my mind, Lord,
May I stop to think 
What I might do,

Being clear and honest
With myself, Lord,
And sharing every part of it 
With you. 

Once we’ve talked it over
May I act, Lord, 
Sorting out my problem
In your way,  

Then, I’ll share your joy
And peace of mind, Lord,
By growing more and more like you 
Each day.

 

References 

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything (Philippians 4:6; NLT).

Do what is right and good in the Lord’s sight (Deuteronomy 6:18; NLT).

Those who say they live in God should live their lives as Jesus did (1 John 2:6; NLT).

Jesus was filled with the joy of the Holy Spirit (Luke 10:21; NLT).

Peace I leave you; my peace I give you (John 14:27; NIV).

We will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ (Ephesians 4:15; NLT).

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You are God’s light

You are God’s light,
His lamp for our feet.

You are God’s truth,
His Word in our minds. 

You are God’s fire,
His flame in our hearts.

You are God’s peace,
His rest for our souls.

You are God’s Son,
His image, his call.

You are God’s love,
His care for us all.

 

References 

Light
I am the light of the world (John 8:12; NLT).
God is light (1 John 1:5; NIV).
Your word is a lamp to guide my feet (Psalm 119:105; NLT).

Truth
I am the way the truth and the life (John 14:6; NIV).
The Spirit is truth (1 John 5:6; NKJV).
The Word became human and made his home among us (John 1:14; NLT).

Fire
He will baptise you with the Holy Spirit and with fire (Matthew 3:11; NLT).
The Lord your God is a consuming fire (Deuteronomy 4:24; NIV). 
Didn’t our hearts burn within us as he talked with us on the road? (Luke 24:32; NLT).

Peace 
Peace I leave you; my peace I give you (John 14:27; NIV).
The Lord is peace (Judges 6:24; NLT).
I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28; NIV).

Christ
This is my Son, my Chosen One (Luke 9:35; NLT).
Christ is the visible image of the invisible God (Colossians 1:15; NLT).
I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners and need to repent (Luke 5:32; NLT).

Love
To him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by his blood and made us a kingdom, priests to his God and Father, to him be glory and dominion for ever and ever. Amen (Revelation 1:5-6; RSV).
God is love (1 John 4:16; NLT). 
He cares about you (1 Peter 5:7; NLT).

 

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Change

Change germinates in darkness
When we start to seek your light.

Peace springs up with forgiveness
Once we glimpse your sacrifice.

Strength slowly grows through sorrow  
While we grasp your mortal fear;

And when our love matures, at last,
Your harvest-time is near. 

 

References

The kingdom of God is like a farmer who scatters seed on the ground. Night and day, while he’s asleep or awake, the seed sprouts and grows but he does not understand how it happens. The earth produces the crops on its own. First a leaf blade pushes through, then the heads of wheat are formed, and finally the grain ripens. And as soon as the grain is ready, the farmer comes and harvests it with a sickle, for the harvest-time has come (Mark 4:26-9; NLT).

The pain caused you to repent and change your ways (2 Corinthians 7:9; NLT).

This is my blood, which confirms the covenant between God and his people. It is poured out as a sacrifice to forgive the sins of many (Matthew 26:28; NLT).

He [Jesus] prayed more fervently, and he was in such agony of spirit that his sweat fell to the ground like great drops of blood (Luke 22:44; NLT).

The fruit of the Spirit is love (Galatians 5:22; NIV).

Grow to maturity (2 Corinthians 13:11; NLT).

At harvest-time I will tell the reapers, “First collect the weeds and tie them in bundles to be burned, but then gather the wheat into my barn (Matthew 13:30; NET). 

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Exile (Isaiah 9:1-7; NRSV).

Lord,

I spent my early years
In bondage;
My teens and twenties
Trying to escape.

My thirties in the desert
Of depression;
My anxious forties 
In a pathless waste.

My fifties brought me    
To your promised freedom,
A land where I could start
To change and grow.

My sixties came with sickness,  
Loss, restriction,
Yet love and joy at last  
Began to flow. 

How many years remain? 
I cannot guess, Lord.
At present, I have time 
And space to pray –

No longer far from you,
Condemned to exile, 
I dwell in you, and you in me,
Each day. 

 

References

We were Pharaoh’s slaves in Egypt, but the Lord brought us out of Egypt with his strong hand (Deuteronomy 6:21; NLT).

He has known your walking through this great wilderness (Deuteronomy 2:7; HNV).

He chose the Promised Land for our inheritance (Psalm 47:4; NLT).

The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised (Job 1:21; NIV).

You love him even though you have never seen him […] and you rejoice with a glorious, inexpressible joy (1 Peter 1:8; NLT).

All who live in love live in God, and God lives in them (1 John 4:16; NLT).

The yoke of their burden, and the bar across their shoulders, the rod of their oppressor, you have broken (Isaiah 9:4; NRSV).

 

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Yet another chance

Lord,

You give me
Yet another chance:

It’s not too late to join 
Your ceaseless dance;

For when I eat your flesh,
And drink your blood,   

You make me fit to share 
Your dance of love.

 

References

The gardener answered, “Sir, give it one more chance”
(Luke 13:8; NLT).

Praise his name with dancing (Psalm 149:3; NLT).

I am not worthy even to come and meet you (Luke 7:7; NLT).

Unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you cannot have eternal life within you (John 6:53; NLT).

God is love (1 John 4:16; NLT).

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When sorrow comes

When sorrow comes
I long for you,
While you, Lord,
Comfort me.

When sickness strikes
I search for you,
While you, Lord,
Make me whole.

When life is hard
I cry to you,
While you, Lord,
Strengthen me.

When darkness falls
I beg your help,
While you, Lord,
Heal my soul. 

 

References

Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows (John 16:33; NLT).

Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me (Psalm 23:4; NLT).

May the God of peace make you holy in every way (1 Thessalonians 5:23; NLT).

You encourage me by giving me your strength (Psalm 138:3; NLT).

He restores my soul (Psalm 23:3; NKJV).

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