Category: failure

2.7.23: Weak and sick (for B.)

Ruth Kirk
ArsAdAstra: Pixabay.

This prayer rose gently from a beautiful time of bright, wordless prayer. Writing it made me smile, because it arrived backwards, which rarely happens to me.

He knows how weak we are.
(Psalm 103:13; NLT). 

1. Lord,
You know
How weak and sick I am:
I cling to you so tight
That we are one;

2. Help me to serve you well
Each day;
Forgive my every failing, lapse,
And wrong.

3. Lord,
Though I’m nothing,
I rejoice,
Because to you, forever,
I belong;

4. You are my Maker
And my end:
So, though I’m weak and sick, Lord,
I am strong.

He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
(2 Corinthians 12:9-10; NKJV).

References 

Verse 1: I cling to you; your strong right hand holds me securely (Psalm 63:8; NLT).

Verse 2: Serve him and hold fast to him (Deuteronomy 13:4; NIV).

He forgives all my sins (Psalm 103:3; NLT).

Verse 3: I am nothing  (Job 40:4; NLT). 

Rejoice always (1 Thessalonians 5:16; NIV).

You and I both belong to God (Job 33:6; NLT).

Verse 4: You are our maker; and we are all the work of your hand (Isaiah 64:8; BBE).

“I am the Alpha and the Omega – the beginning and the end,” says the Lord God. “I am the one who is, who always was, and who is still to come – the Almighty One” (Revelation 1:8; NLT). 

The dust returns to the ground it came from, and the spirit returns to God who gave it (Ecclesiastes 12:7; NIV).

1.7.23: In your arms

Ruth Kirk
geralt: Pixabay.

This simple poem arrived during a time of quiet worship:

The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms (Deuteronomy 33:27; NKJV).

We wake, pray, and rejoice, Lord,
In your arms;
We give, share, and receive, Lord,
In your hands.

We toil, strive, and progress, Lord,
In your arms;
We fail, sin, and repent, Lord,
In your hands.

We suffer and submit, Lord,
In your arms;
We grieve, weep, and endure, Lord,
In your hands.

We rage, doubt, and despair, Lord,
In your arms;
We hope, trust, and believe, Lord,
In your hands.

We love, serve, and remain, Lord,
In your arms;
We live, die, and unite, Lord,
In your hands.

The dust returns to the ground it came from,
and the spirit returns to God who gave it.
(Ecclesiastes 12:7; NIV). 

References 

Lead them like a shepherd, and carry them in your arms forever (Psalm 28:9; NLT).

Our lives are in his hands (Psalm 66:9; NLT).

In him we live and move and have our being (Acts 17:28; NIV).

There is…one God and Father, who is over all and in all and living through all (Ephesians 4:6-7; NLT). 

The person who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with him (1 Corinthians 6:17; NLT).

Remain in me, and I will remain in you (John 15:4; NLT).

You are all one in Christ Jesus (Galatians 3:28; NLT).

You…are complete through your union with Christ (Colossians 2:10; NLT). 

24.5.23: Shame

Ruth Kirk
Plaque with Doubting Thomas, German ca. 1140–60.

Today’s prayer came to me most unexpectedly yesterday, whilst I was saying grace before breakfast.

Everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard (Romans 3:23; NLT). 

We all have sins that shame us,
Behaviour we regret;
We all have faults and failures,
But Jesus loves us yet.

We know our inner darkness,
The things we can’t put right,
The evils on our conscience,
But Jesus is our light.

We all have guilty secrets,
We haven’t done God’s will;
We’ve judged and wounded others,
But Jesus loves us still.

We know that we are nothing,
Just grains of sand, or dust,
But through Christ comes forgiveness,
So in His name we trust.

Through this man Jesus there is forgiveness for your sins (Acts 13:38; NLT).

There is salvation in no one else! God has given no other name under heaven by which we must be saved (Acts 4:12; NLT). 

Trust in God, and trust also in me (John 14:1; NLT).

References 

I have come as a light to shine in this dark world, so that all who put their trust in me will no longer remain in the dark (John 12:46; NLT). 

Jesus spoke to the people once more and said, “I am the light of the world. If you follow me, you won’t have to walk in darkness, because you will have the light that leads to life” (John 8:12; NLT).

He loves us with unfailing love; the LORD’s faithfulness endures forever (Psalm 117:2; NLT).

I am nothing but dust (Genesis 18:27; NIV). 

There is forgiveness of sins for all who repent (Luke 24:47; NLT). 

A reading: Romans 3:22-25; NLT.

We are made right with God by placing our faith in Jesus Christ. And this is true for everyone who believes, no matter who we are. For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard. Yet God, with undeserved kindness, declares that we are righteous. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins. For God presented Jesus as the sacrifice for sin. People are made right with God when they believe that Jesus sacrificed his life, shedding his blood.

4.5.23: A remarkable dream 

Ruth Kirk
John Martin – Feeding the Five Thousand – B1977.14.4260 – Yale Center for British Art. Wikimedia Commons.

Regular readers will know about my childhood, but for those who don’t, here is a link to a blog which summarises it: https://wp.me/p45bCr-dTm.

While I was lying in my bed, this is what I dreamed… (Daniel 4:10; NLT).

Last night I dreamed that my mother and I were in charge of catering for group of 15-20 adults and children. One day we completely forgot to discuss what to make for their dinner. 

While everyone was out for the afternoon, I tried to make some scones as a surprise for them when they came in. However, I couldn’t find the recipe I was looking for, and everything I tried to do went wrong.

Long before I expected them, the group returned, hungry, and eager for their evening meal. Realising with horror that my mother and I had forgotten all about it, I searched around for some biscuits and leftovers to keep them going. However, what I found was clearly inadequate; I felt ashamed as I offered it around. There wasn’t even any butter or jam to make the stale, dry food a little more palatable.

When my mother appeared, she quickly grasped the situation, went to the kitchen, and started cooking, though we had very few ingredients available, and no meat. Meanwhile, I spent time with our guests.

Eventually she served them with small portions of plain boiled vegetables. The recipients looked very disappointed. It was a woefully inadequate meal, and we both knew it. I expected my mother to be furious with me, but to my utter astonishment, she didn’t dump the blame on me for our joint mistake. We shared our failure without a word of recrimination.

This dream might not sound very surprising to other people, but was very remarkable for me, because nothing remotely like it ever happened while my mother was alive. In fact, throughout my 70 years of life, it was by far the most positive dream I’ve ever had about her.

It’s a long time since my mother died, but I’m starting to wonder if God is slowly moving me towards healing, one dream at a time…

Can a mother forget her nursing child? Can she feel no love for the child she has borne? But even if that were possible, I would not forget you! (Isaiah 49:15; NLT). 

9.4.23: Despite my sins

Ruth Kirk

Happy Easter to you all. This prayer came to me yesterday morning. I jotted it down quickly, but it took 24 hours to put into words!

He loves us with unfailing love (Psalm 117:2; NLT). 

Lord,
Despite my sins and flaws,
Despite my greed and selfishness,
You help me, and forgive,
Because you love me.

Lord,
Despite my fears and griefs,
Despite my pain and suffering,
I trust you and rejoice,
Because I love you.

Lord,
Despite the times I fail,
Despite the many wrongs I’ve done,
We’re joined in spirit, evermore,
As one.

The person who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with him (1 Corinthians 6:17; NLT).

References 

Trust in God, and trust also in me (John 14:1; NLT).

Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows (John 16:33; NLT).

The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord (Job 1:21; CSB). 

Rejoice always (1 Thessalonians 5:16; NIV)

I love you  (Psalm 18:1; NLT).

He forgives all my sins (Psalm 103:3; NLT).

God has united you with Christ Jesus. For our benefit God made him to be wisdom itself. Christ made us right with God; he made us pure and holy, and he freed us from sin (1 Corinthians 1:30; NLT). 

22.3.23: I want to follow Christ

Ruth Kirk
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Jesus_reconstruction_test_phases_from_Turin_Shroud.jpg

Today’s blog came to me soon after waking up:

Then he said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me” (Luke 9:23; NLT). 

I want to follow Christ
In every thought,
Through gain and loss
To serve him as I ought,
And always keep on praying,
As he taught –
For he is all to me,
Though I am naught.

I want to follow Christ
In all I say,
Through weakness, sin and failure,
Come what may,
And always keep on thanking him
Each day –
For Jesus is my life, my truth,
My way.

I want to follow Christ
In all I do,
Through grief, and pain and sorrow,
Sickness, too,
By sharing in the suffering
He knew –
For all he preached and promised us
Is true.

All who believe in the Son of God know in their hearts that this testimony is true (1 John 5:10; NLT). 

I was born and came into the world to testify to the truth. All who love the truth recognize that what I say is true (John 18:37; NLT).

References 

We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5; NIV). 

The LORD gives, and the LORD takes away. Blessed be the name of the LORD (Job 1:21; CSB). 

May your will be done on earth, as it is in heaven (Matthew 6:10; NLT). 

I am nothing (Job 40:4; NLT). 

Speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ (Ephesians 4:15; NLT). 

Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus (1 Thessalonians 5:18; NIV). 

Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me” (John 14:6; NLT). 

Since we are his children, we are his heirs. In fact, together with Christ we are heirs of God’s glory. But if we are to share his glory, we must also share his suffering (Romans 8:17; NLT). 

Through suffering, our bodies continue to share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies (2 Corinthians 4:10; NLT).

The Rosary Hospital

Today I am full of rejoicing, because I’ve been given a steady outlet for my rosaries. Please celebrate this with me!

https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?search=Our+Lady+of+Walsingham&title=Special:MediaSearch&type=image

2.3.23: The Spirit’s lead (#2)

Ruth Kirk

This is the second part of all that came to me yesterday morning in a sudden rush of inspiration (see https://wp.me/p45bCr-dxx):

The Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with sighs too deep for words. And he who searches the hearts of men knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God (Romans 8:26-7; RSV). 

Prayer is not so difficult
When we give you the lead:

Words and silence alternate,
For you know every need.

You help all those we pray for, Lord,
And bless those we forget:

You make up for our failings,
And ensure all needs are met.

He himself gives life and breath to everything, and he satisfies every need (Acts 17:25; NLT).

References 

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30; NIV).

If you love me and obey the command I give you, I will ask the One who sent me to give you another Paraclete, another Helper to be with you always – the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot accept since the world neither sees her nor recognises her; but you can recognise the Spirit because she remains with you and will be within you (John 14:15-17; TIV). 

9.2.23: Dream themes

Ruth Kirk

Recently, I’ve been exploring my dreams in a new way – an approach which shows me the unresolved emotional issues hidden away in my unconscious mind.

Following what I learned a few days ago (see https://wp.me/p45bCr-dph), the next night I began noting down the overall theme, or essence, of each dream. I did this every time I woke, whilst my memories were still fresh.

By the time I was fully awake next morning, I had a list of all the emotions which had surfaced from my unconscious mind into my dreams that night. For the first time ever, I could consciously connect with them, pray about them, and work with them. 

It’s very early days, but the major themes and emotional states I’ve identified so far are: insecurity, anger, losing my temper, lack of confidence, failure and illness.

Having embarked on this inner journey, I have faith that I’ll keep on learning, although it’s impossible to predict what will be revealed next, which is very exciting.

I will give you treasures hidden in the darkness – secret riches. I will do this so you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, the one who calls you by name (Isaiah 45:3; NLT). 

The Rosary Hospital 

Having completed the “pretty” rosary I started yesterday, here is a photo of it. I’m hoping to deliver it tomorrow, or on Saturday:

12.1.23: Many things in life are hard

Ruth Kirk

A few days ago I was thinking about what a struggle it can be just to give to others, though perhaps giving is relatively easy in comparison to many of life’s other challenges. Almost before I knew it, I had to start writing today’s blog:

I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world (John 16:33; NLT). 

Many things in life
Are hard, Lord:
Giving, saying sorry,
And forgiving those who hurt us;
Facing fear, enduring failure,
Illness, disability, and grief.

Yet, with prayer and practice,
They get easier to manage,
Till they become
A source of growth,
Of thankfulness –
And even inner peace.

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you (John 14:27; NIV). 

References 

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light” (Matthew 11:28-30; NLT).

We know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them (Romans 8:28; NLT).

24.12.22: You’re here

Ruth Kirk

Context: Yesterday morning I looked out of my bedroom window, as I often do when I get up. The sea was roaring, and the wind was blowing the rain hard against the glass. As I watched, I thanked God for being in the storm. Then I rejoiced that God is present in our painful inner storms, as well as in the sunnier times of our lives. The first two lines of today’s prayer arrived instantly, with the rest quickly following:

From Mount Zion, the perfection of beauty, God shines in glorious radiance. Our God approaches, and he is not silent. Fire devours everything in his way, and a great storm rages around him (Psalm 50:2-3; NLT). 

You’re here, Lord, in the storm,
And in the sun.

You’re here, Lord, in defeat;
In battle won.

You’re here in every failure,
And success.

You’re always here –
To comfort, heal and bless. 

I am with you always, even to the end of the age (Matthew 28:20; NLT).

References 

Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world (John 16:33; NLT). 

God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him (James 1:12; NLT). 

Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me (Psalm 23:4; NLT).

He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases. He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies. He fills my life with good things. My youth is renewed like the eagle’s! (Psalm 103:3; NLT).