This prayer came to me at around six’ o’clock in the morning a couple of days ago, after I’d been awake for about two hours:
Give thanks in all circumstances;
for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
(1 Thessalonians 5:18; NIV).
1. Thank you, my Father,
For sleeping and wakefulness,
Loving and loneliness,
Sunlight and rain.
2. Thank you, my Father,
For pleasure and wretchedness,
Good health and suffering,
Comfort and pain.
The LORD gives, and the LORD takes away.
Blessed be the name of the LORD.
(Job 1:21; CSB).
References
Verse 1
– Everything comes from him and exists by his power and is intended for his glory (Romans 11:36; NLT).
– Whatever happens to you, accept it (Sirach 2:4; NJB).
– When times are good, be happy; but when times are bad, consider this: God has made the one as well as the other (Ecclesiastes 7:14; NIV).
Verse 2 – I bring prosperity and create disaster; I, the Lord, do all these things (Isaiah 45:7; NIV).
– He wounds, but he also binds up; he injures, but his hands also heal (Job: 5:17; NIV).
– I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength (Philippians 4:11-13; NLT).
On Monday night I laid down to sleep, turned off my light, and said the *Nunc Dimittis, as usual (please look just below today’s references for this glorious canticle). Then I prayed quietly about the state of the world, feeling sad and rather tearful. Soon, the first verse of today’s prayer arrived, which rarely happens at night. Fortunately, it was quick and easy to write down on my iPad in the dark.
The next day, having completed the references, and just when I thought the whole blog was finished, a second verse arrived completely unexpectedly. Then I knew it was finished.
Though I sit in darkness, the Lord will be my light (Micah 7:8; NLT).
1. In darkness, I pray, Lord,
In silence, I weep;
In stillness, I sigh, Lord,
And then try to sleep.
2. But when I can’t sleep, Lord,
And can’t even pray,
Please help me to cling to you, Lord,
Till next day.
I cling to you; your right hand upholds me.
(Psalm 63:8; NIV).
God has taken his place in her; she will not be moved:
he will come to her help at the dawn of morning.
(Psalm 46:5; BBE).
References
Verse 1: Sit now in darkness and silence (Isaiah 47:5; NLT).
I weep and my eyes overflow with tears (Lamentations 1:16; NIV).
Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes (Psalm 37:7; NIV).
You know what I long for, Lord; you hear my every sigh (Psalm 38:9; NLT).
Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted (Psalm 25:16; NIV).
Verse 2: You don’t let me sleep. I am too distressed even to pray! (Psalm 77:4; NLT). Clingtohim (Deuteronomy 10:20; NLT).
My soul yearns for you inthenight (Isaiah 26:9; NIV).
When I awake, I will see you face to face and besatisfied (Psalm 17:15; NLT).
*The Nunc Dimittis: Luke 2:29-32; KJV.
Lord, now lettest thou thy servant depart in peace, according to thy word: for mine eyes have seen thy salvation, which thou hast prepared before the face of all people; a light to lighten the Gentiles, and the glory of thy people Israel.
Yesterday, as so often, a migraine made my constant hot sweats harder than usual to tolerate patiently. I wrote nothing in the morning, and felt depressed, lonely and isolated. Then, at about 4.30pm, to my great surprise, today’s prayer came to me. Reminding me of the only wise way forward, it brought a moment of relief, and even hope, to an otherwise unrelievedly grey day.
Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted
(Psalm 25:16; NIV).
I am deeply depressed (Psalm 42:6; CSB).
1. Prince of Peace, I cannot change How lonely and depressed I feel,
2. So, instead, I turn to you,
And beg you, Lord, Hear my appeal:
3. Strengthen me To face this daily struggle, Or my heart Will break;
4. Help me to accept, Endure, And bear my cross, For your love’s sake.
Then he said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me” (Luke 9:23; NLT).
References
Verse 1: Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world (John 16:33; NLT).
Verse 2: Hear my prayer, LORD, and listen to my cry for help (Psalm 39:12; CSB).
Verse 3: My soul is weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your word (Psalm 119:28; NIV).
Is not all human life a struggle? (Job 7:1; NLT).
An aching heart breaks the spirit (Proverbs 15:13; HNV).
My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise (Psalm 51:17; NIV).
Verse 4: My Father! If this cup cannot be taken away unless I drink it, your will be done (Matthew 26:42; NLT).
Patient endurance is what you need now, so that you will continue to do God’s will (Hebrews 10:36; NLT).
Context: I’ve been struggling badly since a new drug was added to my cocktail a week or so ago. Amongst other side-effects, it made me unable to concentrate, or to pray, and therefore, unable to write. Worst of all, it made me feel that life was no longer worth living.
However, yesterday, with medical help, I reduced the quantity of this drug by 50%, and today, to my great joy, I found I could both pray, receive inspiration and write again.
Tomorrow I hope to post what I was given this morning, but for now, here is an astonishingly appropriate piece I chose and prepared last night, with no idea that my state of mind might be about to change.
This prayer arrived very early one morning some weeks ago, when I woke at dawn and couldn’t go back to sleep. The photo is the view from my bedroom window that day:
My God turns my darkness into light (Psalm 18:28; NIV).
You turn my darkness into light,
My sickness, into health;
My weakness into strength, Lord,
And my poverty, to wealth.
You turn my mourning into joy, My sighing, into prayer;
My loneliness, to oneness, Lord,
My selfishness, to care.
You turn my water into wine, My sinfulness, to good;
My anger, into peace, Lord,
And my bitterness to love.
You turn my losses into gains, My dross, to precious ore;
My death, Lord, to eternal life
With you, for evermore.
In all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (Romans 8:28; NIV).
References
I tell you the truth, those who listen to my message and believe in God who sent me have eternal life. They will never be condemned for their sins, but they have already passed from death into life (John 5:24; NLT).
You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy, that I might sing praises to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever! (Psalm 30:11-12; NLT).
Context: I’m so drained that I’m finding prayer very difficult. Depression is creeping closer, threatening to overwhelm me. Two days ago I sat on the floor with my back resting against the wall, attempting to pray. After a time of silence, this little poem arrived:
I weep with sorrow (Psalm 119:28; NLT).
1. I weep with pain and sorrow, Lord,
With loneliness, and grief.
2. Weariness destroys my freedom,
Sickness is a thief.
3. Anguish closes over me, It suffocates, like sin,
4. Yet still your love beats in my blood,
For you, Lord, live within.
Christ is all that matters, and he lives in all of us (Colossians 3:11; NLT).
References
1.He told them, “My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.” He went on a little farther and bowed with his face to the ground, praying, “My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine” (Matthew 26:37-9; NLT).
2.Very truly I tell you, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go (John 21:18; NIV).
3.Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; all your waves and breakers have swept over me (Psalm 42:7; NIV).
4.You are the temple of the living God (Luke 17:21; NKJV).
Don’t you realise that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you? (1 Corinthians 3:16; NLT).
Context: This blog came to me in a split second, when I waswashing my face after getting up late. It was a few days after my hospital trip to London, and I was feeling drained, lonely and rather sorry for myself. God spoke to me so personally that I was nearly knocked off my feet:
The whole law can be summed up in this one command: ‘Loveyourneighboras yourself’ (Galatians 5:14; NLT).
Keep on offering your love to others, but don’t expect their love in return.
Keep on listening to others, but don’t expect them to listen to you in return.
Keep on taking an interest in other people’s news, but don’t expect them to show any interest in yours.
Keep on showing your sympathy to those who suffer, but don’t expect their sympathy in return.
Never try to elicit a caring response from those you think might ‘owe’ you some love in return. It won’t work, and the effort will only increase your sadness and loneliness.
When you’re too drained to support others, stop trying. Wait until you have some energy to spare. Say nothing; do nothing; rest.
Just keep on practicing Mother Theresa’s teaching on humility: “Accept being slighted, forgotten and disregarded” (reference below).
Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love (Ephesians 4:2; NLT).
Context: When I woke up yesterday, I said the Lord’s Prayer, closed my eyes again, and continued to pray, using very few words. This went on in darkness for some minutes, until I was suddenly flooded with bright, golden light. Then today’s prayer started to flow. It was a wrench to open my eyes and start writing, but I knew it was essential, for the words would otherwise disappear as quickly as they arrived.
My expectation is that only when I’m dying will I see this wonderful light and not need to break off to write. From that moment onwards there will be no more need for words: I will simply be absorbed into God’s brilliant, beautiful, infinite light, peace and love.
Though I sit in darkness, the Lord will be my light. (Micah 7:8; NLT).
Yahweh,
When I sit in darkness,
You re-fill me with your light,
And, when I am weak and weary,
You restore me with your might.
Jesus,
When I’m stressed and anxious,
You refresh me with your peace,
And, when I am judged and censured,
Your protection does not cease.
Spirit, When I’m sad and lonely,
You surround me with your love,
And, when I must leave this world,
You’ll bear my soul to heaven above.
Threefold God, My source, my goal,
My Father, Mother, kith and kin,
You are here, and live forever –
All around me, and within.
The Spirit of God has made me,
and the breath of the Almighty gives me life.
(Job 33:4; NLT).
The dust returns to the ground it came from,
and the spirit returns to God who gave it.
(Ecclesiastes 12:7; NIV).
We know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love.
Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.
(1 John 4:16; NIV).
We do not know how to pray as we ought. (Romans 8:26; NRSV).
You desire honesty from the womb (Psalm 51:6; NLT).
Prayer is sharing every thought, Sensation, feeling, word and deed
With God.
Prayer is sharing all our weakness, Judgement, sin and selfishness
With God.
Prayer is sharing stillness, silence, Darkness, need and loneliness
With God.
Prayer is sharing all our joys and sorrows,
Pain, fear, life and death
With God.
Prayer is listening, trusting, loving – Facing all we undergo
With God.
Yea, though I walk in the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me. Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. (Psalm 23:4; KJV).
References
Pray continually (1 Thessalonians 5:17; NIV).
Pray about everything (Philippians 4:6; NLT).
Pour out your heart to him, for God is our refuge (Psalm 62:8; NLT).
Hello! A warm welcome to everyone who visits “Seeking God’s face”, and to all who follow here regularly. I pray for you all each day.
2. Home shrines
This blog brings a very simple message: to suggest that many people could find joy, comfort, support and self-expression through having a home shrine, especially those of us who are sick or disabled, and can no longer go to church.
3. My shrine
My shrine is in my bedroom, on the chest of drawers. In this room, I can close the door, and pray in private. The shrine has developed slowly over several years, having started with the large wall cross, a few flowers, a candle, and an incense burner.
Whenever I want to, I make changes to it, removing items that have served their purpose, and introducing others which are particularly significant for me at the time. As my faith becomes increasingly universal, I plan to incorporate relics from other faiths. Nothing is included out of a sense of obligation or pressure.
4. Personal spiritual practices
A home shrine offers an opportunity for the daily expression of personally meaningful spiritual practices. For example, I stoop to kiss the small wooden cross at the front, just as a priest kisses the altar before saying mass. Then I dip my fingers in the small bowl of holy water, blessing myself with the sign of the cross. Sometimes I do this in the Roman Catholic way, sometimes in the Russian Orthodox style, just as I wish.
Occasionally I light a candle or an incense stick, though I never leave these burning in my absence or whilst I’m asleep, in case of fire.
5. Prayers
My shrine includes two framed prayers which mean a lot to me. Their presence enables me to include them in my daily worship whenever I want to, and reminds me of the words, if I forget them.
The first is about the “little way” of Sainte Thérèse de Lisieux, whose name I took at confirmation (https://wp.me/p45bCr-acZ), whilst the second is a prayer for world peace (https://wp.me/p45bCr-aCa).
Sometimes I am able to stand in front my shrine to pray for a minute or two. However, when I’m too tired, unwell, cold, or lightheaded to do this, I simply begin praying there, then get into bed to continue whilst lying down. Last thing at night, it’s a pleasure to thank God for all my day has brought, both good and bad. Then I say goodnight, and settle down to sleep.
6. Icons
Whether I’m just passing my shrine, or staying a little longer, I often touch each icon with love before I move on. My room also includes three large wall icons, hanging at just the right height to touch, hold gently with both hands, and kiss, as I whisper my prayers.
7. A very private place
Some people might scoff at these practices, judging them to be sentimental, foolish, pointless, or even idolatrous. However, for me the beauty of my home shrine is that it is a very private place where I can be honest with God without any kind offormality, using my own words, however few or many they may be. It’s also a very good place to “be still and silent” before God, for a few, precious moments.
8. A safe place….
Furthermore, my shrine gives me a “safe place” to return to in my imagination when I need extra support in the outside world. This grounding effect is enhanced by a holding cross, made in Bethlehem from the prunings of olive trees. When I received it, I blessed it at my shrine, then left it there overnight to absorb the essence of its peace and beauty.
9. …coupled with a holding cross
During the daytime, I wear this cross around my neck on a long cord, hanging beneath my clothes. When I need it, I discretely retrieve it with the cord. Visualising my shrine whilst holding my cross hidden in the palm of one hand, or clasped between both, is a great source of help, strength and comfort. I do this when I face traumatic events, flashbacks, unpleasant medical treatments, pain, strong emotions, interpersonal conflict, or feared situations. Despite its small size, this little cross powerfully re-connects me to the peace and safety of my shrine.
At night, I have a similar cross, but on a much shorter cord. Secured around my wrist, it stays in my hand whilst I am asleep. This cross is a tangible, comforting reminder of God’s presence each time I wake up.
10. Final words
It feels strange to share these very personal, central aspects of my life with you, yet it seems important to do so. The opportunities offered by home shrines for spiritual nourishment, and for direct, free self-expression before God are far too valuable to keep to myself.
May God bless you all each day.
With much love from Ruth xxxxx
References
1. Welcome
I urge you, first of all, to pray for all people. Ask God to help them; intercede on their behalf, and give thanks for them (1 Timothy 2:1; NLT).
3. My shrine
When you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father in private (Matthew 6:6; NLT).
5. Prayers
Should we accept only good things from the hand of God, and never anything bad? (Job 2:10; NLT).
Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows (John 16:33; NLT).
Though the Lord gave you adversity for food and suffering for drink, he will still be with you to teach you (Isaiah 30:20; NLT).
The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord (Job 1:21; CSB).
Be thankful in all circumstances (1 Thessalonians 5:18; NLT).
7. A very private place
Pray about everything (Philippians 4:6; NLT).
Pray continually (1 Thessalonians 5:17; NIV).
You desire honesty from the womb (Psalm 51:6; NLT).
Pour out your heart to him, for God is our refuge (Psalm 62:8; NLT).
Be still and know that I am God! (Psalm 46:10; NLT).
Be silent before the Lord, all humanity (Zechariah 2:13; NLT).
8. A safe place…
You have been my refuge, a place of safety when I am in distress (Psalm 59:16; NLT).
This I declare about the Lord: he alone is my refuge, my place of safety; he is my God, and I trust him (Psalm 91:2; NLT).
9. …coupled with a holding cross
The message of the cross is foolish to those who are headed for destruction! But we who are being saved know it is the very power of God (1 Corinthians 1:18; NLT).
When I wake up, you are still with me! (Psalm 139:18; NLT).
10. Final words
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances(1 Thessalonians 5:16-18; NIV).
