28.5.23: Take a step

Christ Pantocrator, a photo of an icon on my bedroom wall, author unknown.

Just as I reached the end of my few spoken prayers yesterday morning, today’s verses began to flow into my mind. I had to postpone falling silent, so I could write them down.

Their rhythm might sound a bit odd if you read them as a poem, but they fit the tune of my favourite childhood Sunday School chorus, “Turn your eyes towards Jesus”. I tried to include a YouTube link to it, but failed.

The original moving, meditative song was written by Helen Lemmel, in 1918. Her words are available on Google, but I don’t want to risk breaching copyright by quoting them here.

Instead, here is a recording of me singing today’s prayer to her tune. Please forgive my weak voice and shortness of breath:

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Then he said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me” (Luke 9:23; NLT).

Take a step towards Jesus,
Turn to his Father, repent,
Then relinquish selfishness,
Take your cross,
And follow the Saviour
God sent.

Christ forgives every trespass,
Taking away all your sin,
Then He sets you free
For abundant life,
As you grow every day
More like Him.

The Lord – who is the Spirit – makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image (2 Corinthians 3:18; NLT).


References

Each of you must repent of your sins and turn to God, and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. Then you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit (Acts 2:38; NLT).

God so loved the world, that he even gave his only begotten Son, so that whoever believes in him should not perish, but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world should be saved by him (John 3:16-17; LB).

I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full (John 10:10; NIV).

As we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world (1 John 4:17; NLT).

This will continue until we all come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature in the Lord, measuring up to the full and complete standard of Christ (Ephesians 4:13; NLT).

We will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ (Ephesians 4:15; NLT).

25.5.23: Wordless prayer

Triptych with the Way to Calvary, the Crucifixion, and the Disrobing of Jesus, Netherlandish or French, ca. 1400–1420, at The Met Fifth Avenue in Gallery 306.

Today’s prayer arrived yesterday morning, but it was such a busy and eventful day that I didn’t start working on it until late last night. I finished it this morning, just a few moments before posting it!

Be silent before the LORD, all humanity (Zechariah 2:13; NLT). 

Before a word is on my tongue you, LORD, know it completely (Psalm 139:4; NIV).

Ask, without questions;
Seek, without fear;
Knock, without striking:
Jesus is near.

Pray, without speaking;
Sing, without sound;
Dance, without moving:
Jesus is found.

Join him, forever;
Ages, transcend;
Jesus within us:
One without end.

You also are complete through your union with Christ (Colossians 2:10; NLT).


References 

Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened (Luke 11:9-10; NLT). 

Be still, and know that I am God! (Psalm 46:10; NLT). 

The Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with sighs too deep for words. And he who searches the hearts of men knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God (Romans 8:26; RSV).

There is only one God and one Mediator who can reconcile God and humanity – the man Christ Jesus (1 Timothy 2; NLT).

Christ is all that matters, and he lives in all of us (Colossians 3:11; NLT).

24.5.23: Shame

Plaque with Doubting Thomas, German ca. 1140–60.

Today’s prayer came to me most unexpectedly yesterday, whilst I was saying grace before breakfast.

Everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard (Romans 3:23; NLT). 

We all have sins that shame us,
Behaviour we regret;
We all have faults and failures,
But Jesus loves us yet.

We know our inner darkness,
The things we can’t put right,
The evils on our conscience,
But Jesus is our light.

We all have guilty secrets,
We haven’t done God’s will;
We’ve judged and wounded others,
But Jesus loves us still.

We know that we are nothing,
Just grains of sand, or dust,
But through Christ comes forgiveness,
So in His name we trust.

Through this man Jesus there is forgiveness for your sins (Acts 13:38; NLT).

There is salvation in no one else! God has given no other name under heaven by which we must be saved (Acts 4:12; NLT). 

Trust in God, and trust also in me (John 14:1; NLT).


References 

I have come as a light to shine in this dark world, so that all who put their trust in me will no longer remain in the dark (John 12:46; NLT). 

Jesus spoke to the people once more and said, “I am the light of the world. If you follow me, you won’t have to walk in darkness, because you will have the light that leads to life” (John 8:12; NLT).

He loves us with unfailing love; the LORD’s faithfulness endures forever (Psalm 117:2; NLT).

I am nothing but dust (Genesis 18:27; NIV). 

There is forgiveness of sins for all who repent (Luke 24:47; NLT). 


A reading: Romans 3:22-25; NLT.

We are made right with God by placing our faith in Jesus Christ. And this is true for everyone who believes, no matter who we are. For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard. Yet God, with undeserved kindness, declares that we are righteous. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins. For God presented Jesus as the sacrifice for sin. People are made right with God when they believe that Jesus sacrificed his life, shedding his blood.

19.5.23: Nothing I need

Image by Christopher Kuszajewski from Pixabay.

Two days ago, I received these verses during wordless prayer. Most unusually, I was able to write them down, then continue the silence without it being broken.

You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence (Psalm 16:11; NLT).

There’s nothing I need
But your presence,
Nothing to do
But your will;

Nothing to say
But, “I love you”,
Nothing to see
But your light.

There’s nothing to utter
But, “Jesus“,
Nothing to offer
But thanks;

Nothing I want
But your mercy,
Nothing to do
But unite.

You also are complete through your union with Christ (Colossians 2:10; NLT).


References

I want your will to be done, not mine (Luke 22:42; NLT).

Be silent before the LORD, all humanity (Zechariah 2:13; NLT).

I love you, Lord (Psalm 18:1; NLT).

God is light (Job 33:28; NLT).

God elevated him to the place of highest honor and gave him the name above all other names, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father (Philippians 2:9-11; NLT).

Give thanks in all circumstances (1 Thessalonians 5:18; NIV).

Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy! (Psalm 57:1; NLT).

The person who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with him (1 Corinthians 6:17; NLT).

Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ and become one with him (Philippians 3:8-9; NLT).

16.5.23: More like you

Image by Marcel Dominic from Pixabay.

The Lord – who is the Spirit – makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image (2 Corinthians 3:18; NLT). 

Lord,
Please make me more like you.
Consume my sins, my heart, renew,
Then I’ll show love in all I do,
And light the way for others, too.

Lord,
Please make me more like you,
So all I say is kind and true.
My judgements, fears and greed, subdue,
Until I’m perfect, through and through.

You are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect (Matthew 5:48; NLT).


References

Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven (Luke 6:37; NIV).

This will continue until we all come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature in the Lord, measuring up to the full and complete standard of Christ (Ephesians 4:13; NLT). 

We will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ (Ephesians 4:15; NLT).

Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him (Colossians 3:10; NLT).


The Rosary Hospital

A batch of fiat rosaries, made with a combination of new and recycled parts.

12.5.23: No need to study

Image by Ramalekshmi Rajamanickam from Pixabay.

Today’s prayer is the second of a linked pair which came to me last Wednesday morning. For those who are interested, the first part is called “My way”, and here is a link to it: https://wp.me/p45bCr-e39.

Much study wears you out (Ecclesiastes 12:12; NLT).

No need to study,
No need to wait,
No need to doubt, Lord:
You are my faith.

No need to waver,
No need to quote,
No need to fear, Lord:
You are my hope.

Father, around me,
Jesus, above,
Spirit, within me:
You are my love.

Three things will last forever – faith, hope, and love – and the greatest of these is love (1 Corinthians 13:13; NLT).

God is love (1 John 4:16; NLT).


References 

There is …one God and Father, who is over all and in all and living through all (Ephesians 4:5-6; NLT).

Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God (Colossians 3:1; NIV). .

We believers also groan, even though we have the Holy Spirit within us as a foretaste of future glory (Romans 8:23; NLT). 

I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine (Song of Songs 2:16; NIV).

I jumped up to open the door for my love (Song of Songs 5:5; NLT).


A reading from Psalm 139:5-10; NLT.

You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand! I can never escape from your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence! If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave, you are there. If I ride the wings of the morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans, even there your hand will guide me, and your strength will support me.

11.5.23: My way

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay.

This prayer came to me yesterday morning, when I was saying grace before breakfast. It began with just the first two lines, which I noted down, expecting nothing further. However, over the following hour the rest slowly arrived, line by line, until it was complete. Then, to my surprise, tomorrow’s prayer came, too, forming a linked pair.

I have calmed and quieted myself, like a weaned child who no longer cries for its mother’s milk. Yes, like a weaned child is my soul within me (Psalm 131:2; NLT). 

Nothing to ask for,
Nothing to say,
Nothing I need, Lord:
You are my way. 

You are my water,
You are my food,
You are my Teacher:
You are my truth.

Father, in sickness, 
Jesus, in strife,
Spirit, in sorrow:
You are my life.

Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6; NLT). 

3.5.23: Life

Photo by courtesy of Mary Rodgers.

You have shown me the way of life (Acts 2:28; NLT). 

Life
Is a journey
With Jesus.

Faith
Is the way
Back to God.

Hope
Is a walk
With his Spirit.

Love
Is the path
That Christ trod.

Three things will last forever – faith, hope, and love – and the greatest of these is love (1 Corinthians 13:13; NLT).

30.4.23: Honest prayer #3

Image by Mona El Falaky, from Pixabay.

Today’s article is the last in a series of three. It draws together what I have learned so far about honest prayer, including praying about the issues hidden in my shadow-self. If you would like to check out the previous two parts, here is the link to Part 1: https://wp.me/p45bCr-dXu, and for Part 2:  https://wp.me/p45bCr-dXD.

Then the Lord said to him, “You Pharisees are so careful to clean the outside of the cup and the dish, but inside you are filthy – full of greed and wickedness!” (Luke 11:39; NLT). 

Following Biblical teaching on prayer, I want to:

  • Pray about everything (Philippians 4:6; NLT).
  • Pray continually (1 Thessalonians 5:17; NIV).
  • Pray simply (Matthew 6:7-13; NLT).
  • Pray truthfully (Ephesians 4:15; NLT).

 And these are the things I don’t want to do:

  • Pray about what I think I should pray about.
  • Say what I think God wants to hear.
  • Ask for what I think I should ask for.
  • Hide whatever is happening in my shadow-self.

My way forward in prayer is to:

  • Be completely honest, straightforward and direct with God.
  • Confess my sins as soon as I’m aware of them, say sorry to God, then to the person concerned, and work towards reconciliation, if possible.
  • Tell God about everything in my shadow-self, especially the issues I would rather hide, ignore, or deny.

Jesus shared everything with God, so I can do the same. For example, I can:

  • Ask questions, express doubts, and weep.
  • Tell God about my self-pity, shame and regrets.
  • Express my frustration, irritation, anger, fear, anguish, grief, dread and despair.

Conclusions

I don’t want to “sanitise” my prayers by concealing my shadow-self. Neither will I say anything which is untrue. For example, I don’t recite prayers about being joyful or loving when these things are not genuinely present in my emotions and behaviour.

Rather, I want to speak the truth in prayer with complete honesty and openness at all times. Nothing I say will ever surprise or shock God, who knows everything about me long before I begin to speak. In fact, he is waiting for me to come to him and to confide in him, just as Jesus confided in him during his time on earth.

The LORD must wait for you to come to him so he can show you his love and compassion (Isaiah 30:18; NLT).


Additional references

Before a word is on my tongue you, LORD, know it completely (Psalm 139:4; NIV).

I know every thought that comes into your minds (Ezekiel 11:5; NLT).

He knows the secrets of every heart (Psalm 44:21; NLT).

I, the LORD, search all hearts and examine secret motives (Jeremiah 17:10; ESV).

O LORD, you have examined my heart and know everything about me (Psalm 139:1; NLT).

The LORD’s light penetrates the human spirit, exposing every hidden motive (Proverbs 20:27; NLT).

In all their suffering he also suffered, and he personally rescued them. In his love and mercy he redeemed them. He lifted them up and carried them through all the years (Isaiah 63:9; NLT).

Confide in him at all times, ye people; pour out your heart before him: God is our refuge (Psalm 62:8; DBY).

As for me, I will confide in thee (Psalm 55:23; DBY).

We will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ (Ephesians 4:15; NLT).


The Rosary Hospital 

I took a few days off from making rosaries, following the completion of my largest project so far, and because my anxiety and depression are high. Today’s Fiat rosary is the first of a new order.

29.4.23: Honest prayer #2

Briton Rivière – The Temptation in the Wilderness. Wikimedia Commons.

Today’s blog is part two in a series of three short articles discussing the importance of facing and sharing the contents of the shadow-self in honest prayer.

Jesus’ shadow-self

Yesterday’s blog (https://wp.me/p45bCr-dXu), was personal, but today’s will focus on how Jesus faced and expressed his shadow, both with God, and with people. We can have no better example than his.

Temptation (Matthew 4:1-11; NLT)

During the Gospel accounts of Jesus’ forty days in the wilderness, his shadow-self is represented as a being who tempts him to go against his conscience by disobeying God.

These accounts show plainly that even Christ suffered from temptation. Like us, he had to wrestle with, resist, and overcome, his seductive fantasies and impulses. He needed to do this in order to face the huge personal sacrifices his ministry would require of him:

We do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are – yet he did not sin (Hebrews 4:15; NIV).

Irritation (Luke 9:37-43; NLT)

At times, Jesus became exasperated, both with his followers, and with the Scribes and Pharisees. For example, when his disciples were unable to heal a boy suffering from epilepsy, Jesus became frustrated and irritated. Instead of concealing how he felt, he spoke to them very directly and honestly:

You faithless and corrupt people! How long must I be with you and put up with you? (Luke 9:41; NLT).

Then, having expressed how he felt, he healed the boy, and gave him back to his father.

Anger (John 2:13-17; NLT)

When Jesus saw the established corruption and exploitation taking place in the Temple at Jerusalem he was filled with anger. He purposefully made a whip, using it to drive the merchants and money-changers out of the temple. Chaos resulted as he overturned their stalls, scattered their takings, and chased away their sacrificial animals, whilst crying out:

Get these things out of here. Stop turning my Father’s house into a marketplace! (John 2:13-16; NLT). 

Anger, whether righteous or otherwise, is part of everyone’s shadow, however much we might prefer to deny and suppress it.

Grief (John 11:1-45; NLT)

When Jesus heard that his friend was very sick, he delayed visiting him and his sisters. Two days later, knowing that Lazarus had died, he set off to their house. There he experienced the anger and tears which so often characterise human grief. It’s inspiring to see Jesus’ human emotions shared so openly to those around him:

When Jesus saw her weeping and saw the other people wailing with her, a deep anger welled up within him, and he was deeply troubled (John 11:33; NLT). 

Then Jesus wept (John 11:36; NLT). 

Fear (Matthew 26:36-46; NLT)

After the Last Supper, Jesus went with his disciples to an olive grove to pray. Overwhelmed by the profound fear rising from his shadow, he could not conceal his anguish. Realising what he was about to undergo, he begged God to take his suffering away.

I find it oddly reassuring to know that even Jesus experienced and expressed dread, longing for it to be taken away. At Gethsemane, as always, his prayers were absolutely direct, unembellished by flowery language, honest, short and to the point:

He became anguished and distressed (Matthew 26:37; NLT).

He went on a little farther and bowed with his face to the ground, praying, “My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine” (Matthew 26:39; NLT).

He was in such agony of spirit that his sweat fell to the ground like great drops of blood (Luke 22:44; NLT).

Looking ahead

Examining Jesus shadow-side has been a significant challenge for me, but I want to learn from him:

Take my yoke upon you and learn from me (Matthew 11:29; NIV).

Tomorrow I hope to draw some conclusions from this short series on honest prayer.