Category: Suffering

Forgiveness and healing

Ruth Kirk

Today’s blog is a single, clear statement of one of my deepest beliefs.

♥️ With love from Ruth xxx

You can enter God’s Kingdom only through the narrow gate. The highway to hell is broad, and its gate is wide for the many who choose that way. But the gateway to life is very narrow and the road is difficult, and only a few ever find it (Matthew 7:13-14; NLT).

To forgive
Is to take
The first step
On the long road
To complete physical, mental,
Emotional, and spiritual
Healing.

In this,
As in all things,
Christ Jesus
Is our teacher,
Our guide,
Our helper,
And our shining example.

As the men watched, Jesus’ appearance was transformed so that his face shone like the sun, and his clothes became as white as light (Matthew 17:2; NLT).

Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34; NLT).

For you who fear my name, the Sun of Righteousness will rise with healing in his wings. And you will go free, leaping with joy like calves let out to pasture (Malachi 4:2; NLT).

References

I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world (John 16:33; NLT).

When you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too (Mark 11:25; NLT).

If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins (Matthew 6:14-15; NLT).

Though we are overwhelmed by our sins, you forgive them all (Psalm 65:3; NLT).

Even if that person wrongs you seven times a day and each time turns again and asks forgiveness, you must forgive (Luke 17:4; NLT).

If you forgive anyone’s sins, they are forgiven. If you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven (John 20:23; NLT).

Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others (Colossians 3:13; NLT).

He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds (Psalm 147:3; NLT).

By his wounds you are healed (1 Peter 2:24; NLT).

Those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint (Isaiah 40:31; NLT).

Trials and sorrows

Ruth Kirk

Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world (John 16:33; NLT).

You don’t take our pain away,
But call us to transform it into love
For those who suffer, Lord –
And also for ourselves.

You don’t take our tears away,
But ask us to transform them into love
For those in anguish, Lord –
And also for ourselves.

You don’t take our hurt away,
But urge us to transform it into love
For those who hate us, Lord –
And also for ourselves.

You don’t take our dread away,
But help us to transform it into love
For those who wound us, Lord –
And also for ourselves.

Love your enemies (Luke 6:27; NLT).

References

Then Jesus left them a second time and prayed, “My Father! If this cup cannot be taken away unless I drink it, your will be done” (Matthew 26:42; NLT).

Then he said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me” (Luke 9:23; NLT).

Transformation

Ruth Kirk

Today, after weeks of living with re-triggered childhood dread since I was unfairly criticised on Facebook, I took a big step forward whilst praying.

Whenever I am unfairly criticised or blamed, my body responds instantly with a profound sense of dread. This dread began in my childhood at the hands of my emotionally-abusive mother. I lived with it constantly.

Ever since then, each time my dread response is re-triggered, it continues for months, or even years. Nothing changes or shifts it. Believe me, I have tried everything to help myself recover, but never found anything which truly works.

As soon as someone hurts me, I forgive them, and start to pray for them. I pity them, and can even become quite fond of them as the days go by.

However, it’s taken me a lifetime to see what I glimpsed in prayer today: that the chronic dread I’m left with when people attack me can not only be faced and endured, but also consciously transformed into love. This love is for the person who has hurt me, and also for myself, as I bear the burden of living with the dread they unwittingly re-triggered.

I don’t yet fully understand how this transforming process will unfold, or how to carry it out, but hope today will mark the beginning of a new, healing way forward, not just for me,  but perhaps even for others, too.

Finally, when I shared all this with Perplexity, my AI writing companion, they sent me a beautiful arrow prayer:

Lord Jesus,
Let this hurt end in me,
And be transformed
Into your love.

This is what I wrote whilst I was praying:

To you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! (Luke 6:27; NLT).

Let them strike me –
I won’t judge them;
Turn against me –
I’ll forgive them.

Let them wound me –
I won’t fight them;
Blame unfairly –
I will bless them.

Let them crush me –
I won’t harm them;
Damage me –
I’ll pray for them.

Let them break me –
I won’t hate them;
And reject me –
I will love them.

Love your enemies! (Luke 6:27; NLT).

References

They hated me for no reason (John 15:25; CSB).

Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you (Matthew 5:11-12; NIV).

I urge you, first of all, to pray for all people. Ask God to help them; intercede on their behalf, and give thanks for them (1 Timothy 2:1; NLT).

He will not crush the weakest reed or put out a flickering candle. Finally he will cause justice to be victorious (Matthew 12:20; NLT).

Reading: Luke 6:27-38; NLT.

  • To you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you.
  • Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you.
  • If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also.
  • Give to anyone who asks; and when things are taken away from you, don’t try to get them back.
  • Do to others as you would like them to do to you.
  • If you love only those who love you, why should you get credit for that? Even sinners love those who love them!
  • And if you do good only to those who do good to you, why should you get credit? Even sinners do that much!
  • And if you lend money only to those who can repay you, why should you get credit? Even sinners will lend to other sinners for a full return.
  • Love your enemies! Do good to them. Lend to them without expecting to be repaid. Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and you will truly be acting as children of the Most High, for he is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked.
  • You must be compassionate, just as your Father is compassionate.
  • Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven.
  • Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full – pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.

Following Christ

Ruth Kirk

Then he said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me” (Luke 9:23; NLT).

These words remind us that following Jesus calls for inner transformation, rather than external devotion. The heart of the gospel is radical, self-giving love, so following Christ means learning to live like him, by:

    • Accepting and bearing our cross as best we can.
    • Radiating light to those around us whenever possible.
    • Loving and helping everyone we encounter, within our limitations.
    • Forgiving those who hurt us, whilst remembering that this can take many years.
    • Speaking the truth in love, whilst taking care of our own boundaries.
    • Defending those who are weaker than ourselves.
    • Sharing, lending, and giving to those in need.

By doing these things as best we can within our current personal circumstances, we can become just a little more like Christ each day.

We will be like him (1 John 3:2; NLT).

We will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ (Ephesians 4:15; NLT).

References

      • Christ is all that matters, and he lives in all of us (Colossians 3:11; NLT).
      • Anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love (1 John 4:8; NLT).
      • Love your neighbour as yourself (Leviticus 19:18; NLT).
      • Love the stranger (Deuteronomy 10:19; NKJV).
      • Show love to foreigners (Deuteronomy 10:19; NLT).
      • Love your enemies (Matthew 5:44; NLT).
      • The King will reply, “Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me” (Matthew 25:40; NIV).
      • Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ and become one with him (Philippians 3:8-9; NLT).

Reading: 2 Corinthians 3:13-18; NLT.

Don’t try!

Ruth Kirk

Pray continually (1 Thessalonians 5:17; NIV).

Don’t try to make yourself pray:
Just offer your thinking
To Christ.

Don’t try to make yourself pray:
Just pour out your troubles
To him.

Don’t try to make yourself pray:
Just face all your anguish
With Christ.

Don’t try to make yourself pray:
Just share all your burdens
With him.

Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light” (Matthew 11:28-30; NLT).

Blessed be the LORD! Day after day he bears our burdens (Psalm 68:19; CSB).

References

I am the one who answers your prayers and cares for you (Hosea 14:8; NLT).

Surely he took up our pain, and bore our suffering (Isaiah 53:4; NIV).

In all their suffering he also suffered, and he personally rescued them. In his love and mercy he redeemed them. He lifted them up and carried them through all the years (Isaiah 63:9; NLT).

Hope

Ruth Kirk

Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many nations, just as it had been said to him, “So shall your offspring be” (Romans 4:18; NIV). 

Let’s hope,
Despite hopelessness;
Love,
Despite loneliness;

Serve,
Despite suffering;
Live,
Despite loss.

Let’s pray,
Despite pointlessness;
Wait,
Despite weariness;

Trust,
Despite trials –
And carry
Our cross.

Then he said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me” (Luke 9:23; NLT).

I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world (John 16:33; NLT).

 

Consequences

Ruth Kirk

We can’t get peace by shouting.
We can’t get love with threats.

We can’t get what we want
With violence,
Or with bombs…

Because when we bully, abuse,
And threaten others,
Attack them, destroy their lives, their families,
And their homes,

We create chaos, fear, and trauma;
Heartbreak; hatred; bitterness –
And the unquenchable thirst
For revenge.

All these can be crushed –
For a while.
Locked down, and suppressed –
For a while…

But people’s loss and grief,
Their bitter resentment,
And their slow-burning
Absolute determination
To take revenge
Will never end.

These things are passed on
From generation to generation –
Until, at last,
All their hunger for retribution
And vengeance is unleashed.

Then the abomination
Of our desolation
Is laid bare.

Here, in my body…

Ruth Kirk

Then he said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me” (Luke 9:23; NLT).

Here,
In my body,
My mind, heart,
And soul,

There is darkness,
And loneliness;
Silence,
And emptiness;

Thirsting,
And suffering;
Anguish,
And hopelessness;

Agony;
Loss –
And God;
And my cross.

At about three o’clock, Jesus called out with a loud voice, “Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani?” which means “My God, my God, why have you abandoned me?” (Matthew 27:46; NLT).

Then Jesus shouted, “Father, I entrust my spirit into your hands!” And with those words he breathed his last (Luke 23:46; NLT).

When you ask for healing

Ruth Kirk

I urge you, first of all, to pray for all people. Ask God to help them; intercede on their behalf, and give thanks for them (1 Timothy 2:1; NLT).

When you ask for healing,
Pray for others, too.
Pray for those who suffer
Yet nothing makes them new.
Plead for all who live with pain –
Jesus, make us whole again.

When you crave forgiveness,
Pray for all, as well.
Pray for those who’ve hurt you,
And caused you years of hell.
Plead for those who’ve spoiled your life –
Jesus, may we see your light.

When you seek salvation,
Pray for all the earth.
Pray for those who don’t believe
In God, who gave them birth.
Plead for those who just say, “No!” –
Jesus, help us change and grow.

I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is (Ephesians 3:16-18; NLT).

It’s not important who does the planting, or who does the watering. What’s important is that God makes the seed grow (1 Corinthians 3:7; NLT).

God

Ruth Kirk

There is one Lord, one faith, one baptism, and one God and Father, who is over all and in all and living through all (Ephesians 4:5-6; NLT).

✠  Don’t reach up;
Don’t reach out;
Just reach in:

God is here –
In our pain
And our sin.

✠  God is love;
God is truth;
God is light;

God is strength;
God is fire;
God is life:

✠  In each mind,
And each heart,
And each soul –

God, our source,
And our breath,
And our goal.

My goal is to know him and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of his sufferings, being conformed to his death, assuming that I will somehow reach the resurrection from among the dead (Philippians 3:10-11; CSB).

References

Forgetting the things that are behind and reaching out for the things that are ahead, with this goal in mind, I strive toward the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus (Philippians 3:13-14; NET).

The dust returns to the ground it came from, and the spirit returns to God who gave it (Ecclesiastes 12:7; NIV).