9.9.22: On pause (with thanks to M.O.)

I’m deeply grateful to a very good friend, who gave me the best possible birthday gift yesterday. Whilst discussing a lengthy project she is working on, she casually mentioned that it was currently “on pause”, though her goal had not changed, and she would continue working towards it when she was ready.

The phrase “on pause” caught my imagination immediately. She had developed the technique of consciously pressing her inner “pause” button, then setting a task aside for a time while she attended to other priorities. This idea came as a real breakthrough for me, as a driven, perfectionist person. My way is to keep on working at a task until it’s as perfect as I can possibly make it, heedless of the personal cost in terms of fatigue, headaches, migraines and loss of sleep.

After feeding my praise and excitement back to her, I thanked her warmly for what she had shared with me. Then I said that I wanted to pause the conversation, so I could write down her words before I forgot them. This took only a few seconds, after which we resumed our discussion. Later, as we parted with a hug, I resolved to embrace pressing “pause” as a new technique to add to my repertoire of coping skills.

Whilst working on a blog later the same day, I was amazed to hear myself say to my husband, “I’ll put this on pause for now”. With that, I laid down my iPad and walked away from my task voluntarily. There was no sense of stress, reluctance, or having to make a huge, conscious effort, neither did I put off taking a break until physical needs forced me out of my chair. This was a completely new behaviour for me. God’s healing is truly amazing! So I now have a specific way to set myself free from the inner pressure which drives me to complete my task, regardless of how I feel, how tired I am, or how late the hour.

NB: After a short break I was able to finish what I was doing, and go to bed at a sensible time for once!

💟 I have prayed for everyone who visits this website today, as always.
May God bless you all. With love from Ruth xxxxx

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