Do not nurse hatred in your heart (Leviticus 19:17; NLT ).
Introduction
Hating others is very common nowadays. Hateful speech and actions are present in our streets, schools and workplaces, in newspapers and online, and wherever there is disagreement, conflict and war. Some countries are even having to introduce detailed legislation about who we should not hate.
Sadly, such legislation can generate bitter arguments about who has been included, and who has been left off the list. So how can we deal with this issue in such a way that everyone can understand it, follow best practice, and help to make the world a better place?
A simple answer
The answer is very simple: Don’t hate anyone. Don’t even judge anyone. Instead, love everyone, just as the Bible teaches.
Three steps
This might sound like a huge challenge, so how can we learn to do it? I’ve broken the process down into three steps, which take only a few seconds to follow. These three stages can be summarised as: STOP, SORRY, and LOVE.
Step 1: STOP
The moment we notice ourselves having a judgemental or hateful thought (or feeling, or impulse), towards someone, whether in the flesh, on TV, in a newspaper, or online, etc, we need to say, “STOP”, to ourselves immediately. As Saint Paul writes: “Take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5; NIV).
Step 2: SORRY
Next, we can say, “Sorry, Lord”, before replacing our judgement with thanks to God for the person concerned, then asking God to bless them. With regular practice, this process becomes an inbuilt reflex the moment we catch a judgemental thought entering our mind.
Step 3: LOVE
The final step is to make a conscious choice to love the person. If circumstances allow, we can smile at them, or say, “Hello”. If appropriate, we can make a pleasant remark to them, or, if needed, offer our help in some simple way. Let’s make their day a little better for having crossed our path. Remember that if the person isn’t physically present, we can still pray for them.
Developing a new habit
To begin with, we might not become fully aware of a judgemental or hateful thought until some time after the moment has passed. We don’t need to beat ourselves up about this. Instead, we can still recognise what we have done, say we are sorry, ask God to bless the person, then pray for them.
With practice, the conscious recognition of unwanted thoughts will come more quickly after each event, until eventually we are able to deal with our judgemental thoughts and feelings on the spot, whilst the person concerned is still in sight.
Exactly the same approach applies when we have critical or hateful thoughts about someone we read about, or see on TV, or who simply passes through our minds unbidden.
With practice, this method of noticing and correcting our judgemental and hateful thoughts gradually becomes an established habit. Critical attitudes and impulses towards others wither away, unrewarded by our attention and indulgence.
What the Bible says
Here are some references to remind us of what the Bible says about who to love. Remember that the answer is very simple: Love everyone:
– May the Lord make your love increase and overflow for each other and for everyone else (1 Thessalonians 3:12; NIV).
– Love your neighbour as yourself (Leviticus 19:18; NLT).
– Love the stranger (Deuteronomy 10:19; NKJV).
– Show love to foreigners (Deuteronomy 10:19; NLT).
– Love your enemies (Matthew 5:44; NLT).
Conclusion: becoming like Christ
In conclusion, let’s begin a world-wide movement against judging and hating others, beginning with changing ourselves. Instead of hating, we can move towards loving everyone, because: “Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers over all wrongs” (Proverbs 10:12; NIV). In this way, we can become just a little more like Christ.
This will continue until we all come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature in the Lord, measuring up to the full and complete standard of Christ (Ephesians 4:13; NLT).
References
You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things (Romans 2:1; NIV).
Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you (Matthew 7:1-2; NLT).
The Lord – who is the Spirit – makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image (2 Corinthians 3:18; NLT).
A reading from 2 Peter 1, 5-8; TIB.
Make every effort to add to your faith, goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, familial love; and to familial love, truly unselfish love. For if these qualities are yours and they are growing in you, they will protect you from becoming ineffective and unfruitful; and they will bring you to a true knowledge of our Savior Jesus Christ.
John 7:24. We are to judge, just not hypocritically.
Hi, and welcome here, Lana. That’s a good point. I would be very interested if you would like to say a bit more to expand your comment, so I can understand your thinking about judging others. With all best wishes from Ruth X
Thanks Ruth. As well as the verse in John in Leviticus 19:15-16 the message is also to judge righteously. What I think is not really important, it is what God’s word says that is key and I would invite people to prayerfully look into the scriptures for themselves. True love warns but often people get annoyed when their sin is pointed out, even when it is addressed in a loving way because that person truly cares about where their eternal soul will end up. The main message of Jesus was “repent.” God is the ultimate judge, however His people are called to expose evil (Ephesians 5:11).
Thank you so much for your detailed and very interesting reply, Lana. You explained beautifully, and I can see where you are coming from. The Hate and love blog was meant to focus entirely on judging people negatively and hating them, rather than just making judgements generally. Behind it lies Jesus teaching us to love everyone, including our enemies. “Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven” (Luke 6:37; NLT). This is what I try to do, leaving the judging to God, just as you said at the end of your comment.
I really do appreciate your engagement here, Lana. With very best wishes from Ruth XXX
Correct, Jesus never taught hate however there is a time to judge and judging is usually negative for the recipient. Righteous judgement can be done without hate. For example, if someone, particularly a believer, is doing the opposite of what the Holy Bible says then it is to be called out, calmly to correct and edify. All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. Jesus is an amazing Saviour! When we repent He forgives us. He is the only way to heaven so we need to love and obey Him, forsaking all other so called spiritual paths. He rescued me from decades of occult practices, new age lies etc and brought me into an amazing personal relationship – not a religion. Peace to you and your family Ruth.
Hi, Lana, so sorry, WordPress has been down several times in the last few days, plus my iPad had to be rushed to the repairers this am, so I am badly behind with my correspondence. I think we are each thinking about quite different kinds of judging. You mention seeing someone doing something against Biblical teaching and God’s law, then being ready to talk with them about it. I, on the other hand, was writing about the sort of secret, negative judgements we can make in our minds and hearts about others, which I have learned through long experience and practice to transform into love. This kind of judgment isn’t based on the person concerned doing anything wrong at all, but on my own inner prejudices, unkind assumptions and so on.
I hope my efforts to clarify this will help us to understand where each of us is coming from. Meanwhile, it sounds as if you have had a very tough time in the past, and made some extraordinary changes in your life to get to where you are now. May God bless you every day.
With very best wishes from Ruth XXXX